Where to begin?

Well, I sit here writing to you with my little netbook on top of my lady bug boppy pillow and my little Livi-bug resting in her carseat next to me.  I didn't want to disturb James with my typing, and Olivia can sleep through just about anything at this point.  (In fact, most of the time I can't manage to keep her awake for more than 10-15 minutes at a time, and that's only when she's hungry!)  James had "first shift" tonight, as we call it...  Meaning he got the 2 AM feeding, so here I am writing at just past 6 AM since I was blessed with "second shift" tonight. So, where to begin?  Well, my pregnancy lasted for thirty-eight weeks exactly.  In comparison to my pregnancy with Gavyn, I have to say that this one was a breeze.  My main reasoning for this was that I suffered with morning (all day) sickness for the entire first trimester (and even a little into the second) with Gavyn.  It was miserable and I distinctly remember actually losing weight at the beginning of my pregnancy.  According to most "old wives' tales," girls are actually the ones who give you a lot of morning sickness - not so!  With Olivia, I did get sick a few times, but it was always in the morning and usually happened at work.  There were only a couple of times where James would have to pull over on the way to work because I felt sick, and I quickly realized that I could avoid that by eating something as soon as I woke up in the morning.  I did often feel nauseous in the first trimester, but I wouldn't always get sick from it.  My main complaint throughout my pregnancy was my back pain, as I had never experienced that with Gavyn.  But each pregnancy is different, just as each baby is different, and I enjoyed both of them, hard times and all.  There were times where I wished that the pregnancy was over, but I always tried to remind myself that one day soon I would miss it and wonder why I rushed it so much.  I've already felt that from time to time when I find myself touching my stomach and then remembering that she has joined us outside of the womb already!

At the end of my pregnancy with Olivia, I found myself even more inclined to try everything possible to try to speed things along and either get her out (once considered full-term) or take things to help ease labor later.  I walked (and walked), had sex, bounced and rolled on a birthing ball, drank red raspberry leaf tea, took evening primrose oil daily, ate spicy foods, stimulated my nipples (whilst bouncing on my ball), did jumping jacks, squatted, and I even tried castor oil as a last resort.  NOTHING WORKED.  When they tell you that baby won't come unless baby is ready, THEY MEAN IT.  So what worked?  What happened to bring on my five hour labor (more on that later)?  Well, it started with a doctor's visit.  I had originally scheduled my visit for our normal Friday appointment.  James and Gavyn never missed a single visit, and we always scheduled them for Friday's because I had that day off of work and James didn't work until night time.  I moved this particular appointment to Thursday, January 27th so that it would be on my 38th week exactly and I could have my membranes swept a day early, hoping to jumpstart labor and give everyone the four-day weekend they all had so desperately hoped for (I received numerous requests for a weekend baby, as if I had any control).  I got to the office, was called back, went straight to the bathroom for what I hoped would be my last urine sample, and walked to the nurse with a smirk on my face ready to have my vitals taken.  I had a conversation with her the week prior about sweeping membranes and she said that it worked for her sister, so I asked her how long it took for it to work during this visit with a smile on my face.  She said that her sister went into labor the night after.  She then escorted me to the exam room where James and Gavyn were already waiting.  Vivian, the midwife who delivered Gavyn, was to see me.  The sheet indicating that I needed to take my bottoms off to be checked was not on the exam table, so I helped myself to the drawer that I had seen them take it out of so many times before and sat waiting for her to come into the room.  We had our usual conversation and I reminded her that Dr. Armbruster promised to sweep my membranes during this visit and that he would induce me at 39 weeks if I hadn't already gone.  Vivian saw me at my 37 week appointment and said that she gave me a 50/50 chance of not needing my next appointment, as I was 2 cm dilated and 50% effaced.  She told me she was surprised to see me this week and checked me to find out that I was just under 4 cm and 60% effaced this time. Olivia was still fully engaged and seemed even lower this week.  She then asked me what every pregnant woman dreams her OB or midwife would ask them in that last slow, grueling 9th month...  "Do you want to have a baby today?"

I looked at her shocked, not knowing whether or not she was joking.  She said that she gave me a good sweep and since I was having contractions that day and was almost 4 cm, I could be admitted to the hospital.  We made plans to meet there at 1:30 pm.  James and I left with the biggest, goofiest smiles on our faces and started calling, texting, and Facebooking everyone immediately.  We were going to have a baby by the end of the day!  We went home, gathered all of our things, waited around a little, and had Tammy (James' mom) come over.  We (me, James, Gavyn, and Tammy) all headed to Five Guys for my last meal.  Why did I choose such a delicious but greasy meal right before I went into labor?  Well, I'm still not sure because Five Guys tastes a lot better going down than it does coming up.  Afterwards, Tammy took Gavyn with her to the house to wait for the call that we had been admitted so she could meet us at the hospital.  James and I ventured to the hospital, arriving about fifteen minutes fashionably late.  By this time, I felt very crampy but didn't have any noticeable contractions.  I was put into Labor & Delivery Room 1 and set up to be monitored.  Baby's heartbeat was strong and to my surprise, I was contracting every 2-3 minutes.  Vivian said that had we not planned this out, I would have been there anyways that day.  It was meant to happen.  So after some monitoring, I was admitted.  At about 2:30 PM, she broke my water.  This was a very different experience for me because my water had broken on its own with Gavyn.  The biggest frustration with my pregnancy with Olivia was not knowing what to expect and never knowing when contractions were the "real deal."  Well, my water was broken and at this point Vivian looked at me and said that we would have a baby sometime between now and 8:00 AM on January 28th.  So the waiting game began.

I laid in the bed for awhile and noticed that my contractions were getting a little stronger and closer together.  I decided to help them along and walked the hospital floors as I had done just the night before with James, Gavyn, and Carissa for an hour when I went in for false labor.  The night I went in for false labor we circled the lobby of the hospital countless times and walked and squatted up and down the stairs between the first and second floor after each lap.  Anyways, I walked for about 15 minutes with my posse (James, Gavyn, Carissa, Tammy, Tyler, my Mom, and Rachel) following me through the halls.  We then went back to the room and I bounced on a birthing ball that they wheeled in for a little while and then continued to wait.  Vivian came in and asked if I wanted my epidural.  I wasn't sure whether or not to take it because my contractions weren't very painful, but I didn't want to wait too long and risk the chance of not being able to get it (I've heard way too many horror stories).  She told me if I got the epidural and was started on Pitocin, it would make my labor shorter, so I agreed.  The epidural wasn't as bad as I remembered it being, and I teared up a little bit, but James told me that I took it like a champ and that he was proud of me.  After the epidural, they had to hook the IV that had been placed into my hand earlier up to Pitocin, fluids, and place a catheter.  At this point, I felt drowsy like I was ready for a nap and sort of like Frankenstein with so many cords connected to me.  Everyone watched the computer as my contractions grew stronger, closer together, and lasted longer.  We waited and waited some more, and at about 6:45 PM, Vivian checked me and realized that I was 5 1/2 cm.  I was making progress, yes!  This was beginning to feel like a breeze compared to my 19 hour labor with Gavyn.  At about 7:00 PM, she checked me again and I was 6 1/2 cm.  Holy crap...  1 cm in 15 minutes?  By this time, my mom had gone to pick up Brooke to bring her to the hospital.  I was progressing fast and she wasn't there yet.  I looked over to Tammy, startled, as I told her I felt the urge to push.  She told me that it was normal and I needed to hold it because I had to wait until I was 10 cm or it would be bad.  Well, the urge grew stronger with each contraction, so when Vivian came in I told her and at about 7:10 PM when she checked me she seemed startled, whispered that I was 9 cm, and she shouted, "EVERYONE OUT EXCEPT FOR FOUR!"  I've never seen a room clear so quickly.  The four in the room were James (obviously), my mom (who had JUST gotten there about 3 minutes before Olivia was born), Tammy, and Carissa.  I had asked the nurse before if I could have a fifth person and she said that if she was still working she would let me, it usually depended on the nurse and whether or not the midwife OK'd it.  Vivian told her it was OK, but the fifth person vanished with the rest of the crowd who had frantically evacuated!  I told everyone in the room to quickly text my little sister, Rachel, and tell her to get in here!  My mom and Tammy were at my hands, Carissa and James at my legs, and Rachel taking pictures and videotaping.  Three pushes (five minutes) later, Olivia was born.  I have officially beaten my 20 minute pushing record.  I warned Carissa and anyone else who watched the video, and I caution you (reader) - LABOR IS USUALLY NOT THIS EASY.  Do not expect a five hour labor (especially the first time!) and do NOT think you will only be pushing for five minutes.  According to everyone in the room, I made this look like a piece of cake.  James wept uncontrollably, kissed me several times, and continued to tell me how much he loved me and how proud of me he was basically for the next couple of days, haha.  Olivia Paige was born on January 27th, 2011 at 7:15 PM weighing 6 lbs, 11 oz and measuring 19 1/4 inches.  She is perfectly healthy in every way and we couldn't be any happier or more lucky.

Immediately after she was born, Carissa helped me clear the room of everyone who watched her be delivered, had Gavyn brought into the room, and the four of us bonded for about twenty minutes before we let everyone come in to see her.  This was one of my very specific requests that I asked Carissa to make sure happened, as I knew I'd get swept up into the moment and forget what I had originally wanted.  She pulled through for me and I'm so glad that we had that moment with just the four of us.  We stayed at the hospital for that night and the next.  Tammy took Gavyn home with her each night, and each night he got a little upset and didn't understand why we couldn't go home with Olivia.  I explained that she had to eat her dinner all gone before she could go home (the hospital requires you to stay 24 hours after the first feed to make sure everything is established), and that we would all be able to go home soon.  He has taken to her so well.  I was so worried that he might be jealous or not be interested in the baby, but I'm actually dealing with the opposite.  He wants to hold her all the time and gets upset if other people don't "share" her.  He constantly says how much he loves her and every time he holds her he has a big smile on his face and he starts rubbing, patting, and kissing her.  It's so adorable.  She has also stolen James' heart.  I've melted time and time again as I watch him hold her, baby talk to her, and feed her.  It's very special to me especially because he missed a lot with Gavyn, so it's been amazing seeing it all happen this time.  He's been very loving and thankful for me "giving Olivia to him."  I can't even describe the warm, fuzzy feelings I get spending time with my little family, bonding with them and watching them bond with eacother, and I'm so excited to spend the time off of work with all of them.

In the hospital, I was having difficulty breastfeeding.  Olivia would latch and then either just let it rest there and not do anything, or she would try to feed but then get frustrated and cry.  It wasn't until about 2 AM that the nurse said if she didn't take to my breast soon, her sugars might drop and we'd need to supplement that I decided to give her a bottle.  I walked into this with expectations to breastfeed, but I wasn't hellbent on it because I didn't with Gavyn and everything was fine.  However, I wanted to try this time for the experience and to pass along my antibodies and nutrients.  Both myself and Olivia were getting frustrated and she wasn't getting fed, so for the remainder of my stay in the hospital she was bottlefed.  When we came home, I continued to feed her with the bottle and it wasn't until yesterday when my breasts started to swell and ache that I decided I would start to pump, too.  At first, I only got less than 10 ml from both breasts, but I figured that it was better than nothing - especially because it's the colostrum which is the best thing for them since it contains most of the antibodies to pass along.  Later, I pumped again and got 30 ml.  I was so excited, since 30 ml is a whole ounce which is what she has been eating at each feeding.  Again, later I pumped and got 50 ml.  So needless to say, my milk supply is starting to build.  Well, I woke up at James' 2 AM feeding this morning and decided to give it a try - I tried breastfeeding her again.  She wasn't latching so I chalked it up to nipple confusion and let James feed her with the bottle he had already prepared.  This morning at my 6 AM feeding, I was going to grab some of the breastmilk I had expressed to feed her to heat up...  But my breasts had the sore, achy feeling so I decided to try again.  And I'm excited and proud to say that she took to it like a champ this morning!  She fed until she wasn't hungry and burped twice in between.  Yay!!!  I haven't decided where I'll go from here, I'm sure we will play it by ear and see how things go...  But I imagine it will be a combination of breastfeeding, expressing and bottlefeeding, and supplementing with formula. Anyways, I've been at this for about an hour and I'm ready to give my baby some love even though she looks mighty comfortable wrapped up in her carseat.  Gavyn will probably be waking up soon, so I'm gonna wrap this up!  I know it's veeery long, but I will thank myself later for this, and sorry if any of this has been TMI, but let's be honest - you could've stopped reading a long time ago...  So, bye bye for now!